Finally Free

20 Jul

Today is the day. It is His birthday, and no more than two years ago, I broke His heart, and mangled mine in the process.

I don’t remember the day I broke up with Him (although I am sure he can tell you) because it was drawn out over the course of a week; a mish-mash of phone calls and crying, all right before His birthday.

My excuse for blowing word barf at Him instead of birthday wishes? It was time. I just couldn’t do it anymore.

I couldn’t be confined to what He wanted me be, or the compromises we had made over the years. I didn’t feel like that was what I wanted, that He had my best interests in mind.

I am not the person I was then. I have changed for the better, realized I am capable of truly amazing things, and as strong as I will ever need to be.

So it may be His birthday, and I think of Him fondly, as first loves never really fade.

But really I am celebrating inside a little.

Because sometime this week, two years ago, I let myself live my life.

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