gone for too long

30 Dec

I was gone for too long because I was all sorts of happy. The kind of happy that makes you lay in bed with a boy watching Shawshank Redemption, UP, National Treasure (2?), and WALLE while eating Captain Crunch.

Bliss, I tell you. And I watched Avatar and Zombieland in the same weekend- because honestly we were kind of on a movie kick.

And then I came back, to a not so serious crashing around me. Nothing drastic or life threating, but the stress that is WEIGHING on my chest is almost palpable. All I could think is I shouldn’t feel this bad, because I didn’t lose my job, and I can stil pay my rent, my mom (kinda) loves me, and so do my friends. My car hasn’t died on me and I haven’t been robbed.

In fact- nothing remarkable at all happened. But the stress at work is compounding, and the stress from not being able to pay off my credit cards has taken a liking to depriving me of sleep, and calm, and peace. The stress from stupid health issues, and catching a cold, and the stress of whether or not Refuses and I fit, and the worrying over the work life balance, it all feels as though my basket is full with items that I can’t seem to conquer. The stress from being stressed out about nothing is getting to me.

And it is affecting just about every speck of life.


3 Responses to “gone for too long”

  1. IntrigueMe December 30, 2009 at 8:00 am #

    We women are such over-analyzers aren’t we? I’ve become pretty decent at diffuzing my stressors in the last year. I wouldn’t worry so much about Refuses, enjoy it while you have it and just ride it out! Last year I made a detailed budget (in a spreadsheet) for the whole year that included all my monthly bills and payments to pay off any debt I had. I actually made wicked progress because I could see it there in front of me getting smaller and smaller- and I was way less stressed because I knew I had a plan. I’ve done the same thing for this year, and I actually feel really good about being organized. I feel in control and it’s great! Anyway, maybe that will work for you too! The cold and work I can’t say anything about because those are two that still nip me in the butt. If you figure out how to difuse those two LET ME KNOW!!!

  2. Kristin January 5, 2010 at 6:50 am #

    I agree with IntrigueMe. First off, enjoy your time with Refuses! It is so great that you made it back to each other, just relax and have fun. Money stresses us all out but at the end of the day, its just money. And interest can build up and it sucks, but don’t let it rule or ruin your life. It sounds like you do a great job juggling, take a deep breath and give yourself a break!

  3. busypretending March 26, 2010 at 1:07 am #

    Can I just say with the tag team that you two have going on in my comments- I am never going to have a down moment in my life! Thanks for always being there with sounds advice and never-ending words of encouragement. You two rock!

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