feeling behind

7 Mar

We go through life feeling a little behind, or at least I do.

Not sure if I should have gone to Grad school. Should I still go? Will I go in the future?

I’m earning money, working everyday. How am I supposed to be financially stable? I am making progress, but nowhere near independence and burden-less.

They are getting married, and it is all over facebook. Will I want to someday? Is the person I am with now someone I would marry?

You got engaged and while other girls at the table can only hope, hard. You can see it on their faces. Will I ever be that desperate, and I am going to be able to convince myself that engaged isn’t what I am waiting for?

You are pregnant and so are 5 other girls at your baby shower, and we are oohing over giraffe-shaped teethers. Really?  And all I can think is “Nope, I’m not there yet.”

And then, I find out that you are getting divorced. And my heart breaks for you.

Then, I thank my lucky stars I am where I am, and suddenly I am not feeling so behind.


2 Responses to “feeling behind”

  1. IntrigueMe March 8, 2010 at 9:51 am #

    I feel like this all the time. I spent so much time wishing I had all the things my friends had- then one day I realized that I didn’t want them. At least not right now. I want to make sure I do things RIGHT, not just do them FIRST. I have to remind myself of that a lot.

  2. Kristin March 8, 2010 at 12:43 pm #

    AMEN! Seriously, you just said everything that is on my mind, word for word.

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