Here is the thing with Therapists: You have to like them, to want to talk to them, and to feel like all the information you are spewing isn’t going into a big black hole.
I don’t think I will ever be best friends with mine (thought I would want to be, are there rules against that?), but I leave there after ever session feeling recharged, rejuvenated and armed with realizations and tools to truly make my own life better each day.
When you find a good one, they are life-changing. When you have the wrong one, it feels unsettling, like you lost the last piece of a 500 piece puzzle.
I met a boy at Trader Joe’s.
I had taken a day off in order to go camping with friends for my birthday. I was parked in front of Trader Joe’s where I grew up, and after running to Ralph’s, I attempted to reorganize all of the camping gear in the back of my truck.
He walked towards me between two passing cars, and suprised me. I said hey, mostly as a reflex. And he asked what I was doing.
I was packing my car for a camping trip with my friends.
He asked if I did this often, I said no, with a little giggle.
I asked if he was from around here, and he said yes.
He asked if I wanted to hang out sometime, and I said sure.
He stood there looking blankly back at me, before I asked him if he had his phone, and he muttered something about not doing this often…
We chatted while I packed my car, then demanded he help me load the ice into the coolers if he was just going to stand there.
I was excited about my new prospect & that I got picked up in the parking lot. Way random.
All you can do is move forward.
The nicest boy I have ever dated treated me the worst.
I like you with him. I think that you two have something good going. I have never seen you answer your phone so many times in a day, and you entertain his conversation and his jokes. I like you with him.
It seems comfortable in a way I am not sure you are ready to admit. He seems so in awe of you, so charmed, and we both know that is just how you like to be seen.
You have earned his affections, and your friendship over the years has built a trust between the two of you that no one else can understand.
He has had it hard. Made tough decisions, and been in bad situations.
And you knew him then.
But you also knew his heart. You didn’t ever seem to expect the unexpected, but when he grew strong you were the first to acknowledge his change.
He doesn’t seek your approval, but I am sure he appreciates your honesty, your humility and your friendship.
I like you with him.
Your dedication to a friend in need, a friend in fun, and a friend no matter what, makes me proud to be your friend.
You are the most genuine example of trust and dedication, and your unfailing dedication to your friend makes me happy and honored to have you as a friend of my own.
I like Sunday. I kind of forget what it was like to have my own.
I spent so many Sundays with Refuses, that they seem quieter now.
I loved those mornings, missed the way the sun fell on the sheets, missed the way we would pick up morning coffee after our morning runs.
Just a little missing in the middle of an entire Sunday that is mine.
There is nothing lonelier to me than crawling into half of my bed, with the other half piled high with clothes and items that don’t have any reason to be pushed to the floor.
At the same time though, I have never been more fulfilled when I am hanging out with my girlfriends. There is this understood hope, an invisible strength that keeps us going.
I keep having to remind myself that with friends as good as ours, and my family, I am pretty much set to tackle anything.
That is where I am finding my strength.