because sometimes I forget.
“The silver lining about the guy thing is that it’s better to have
someone show you they want out now rather than not have the guts to do
it and then tell you in three more years. He showed his true colors
and that means you now know that he wasn’t good enough for you.
You’re an extraordinary person, so you deserve to have an equal
partner, not one that has no balls (throwing his infidelity on you).
So in the mean time you get to fun free and the right one will come
your way down the road.
It stings right now, sometimes to the point where you want to throw
up, but we all know it gets better and then eventually you know it was
for the better.
Character building son!!!!!”
What I watch when I am feeling broken-hearted, lonely, bored or they are better on TBS.
- Sex and the City
- The Proposal
- Going the Distance
- He’s Just Not That Into You
- Notting Hill
Better on TBS:
- The Notebook
- Maid in Manhattan
- The Wedding Planner
- Runaway Bride
- How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
- The Rookie
- What a Girl Wants
- 10 Things I Hate About You
- The Prince & Me
- Now and Then
he sent: “thought you would like this juicy bit of news jack and jill went ring shopping… hope you are well :)”
my non-response: “wow. looks like all of you are good at being in shitty relationships.”
he would have said: “you were in the relationship too.”
my non-response: “no. you and I were completely different relationships.”
I haven’t heard from Refuses in 9 months, and he sends hope. you. are. well? I deleted.
5. I love my friends. I have never been so affirmed and so reliant. They, each in their own way, are my centers. Plus, they hate Refuses, so I don’t have to.
4. I might just change the sheets less.
3. I have a new found excitement for Vegas. There is a new Vegas dress, new Vegas shoes, and a whole new Vegas attitude to go with it.
2. One week down. Amen
1. I realized that I am pretty strong. Stronger than most, and most definitely stronger than Refuses. And that brings me comfort.
Refuses texted me the day before Halloween.
“Hey I just got to Vegas for my buddy’s birthday & thinking about the awesome time we had when you and I were here. Miss you & hope you’re well :)”
And I was furious, but determined to not be brought down the day before my Halloween party. We had decorated! There were balloons! I was a sexy bee!
So I ignored him, because I didn’t want to stroke his ego, while he deflated my holiday. I just didn’t think that was fair.
The next day he texted “Sorry” only to earn no response from me. And honestly I could not have been more pissed, that he MOVED AWAY, and he couldn’t find it in himself to keep the pity party to himself?
So I partied without the pity part.
Today is going to be awesome. So go suck it.
heal my heart, please. Because it never seems like the crazy goes far. Always one step behind me, waiting for me to slow down, so it can finally catch up.
heal me sooner rather than later, please. I would like to close the door on you once and for all, and lock out the crazy until the next time.
heal me for now, please. It doesn’t even have to be forever, just for now. The next time will be good, this I know. But the next time is hardly imaginable, with no foreseeable future.
And I truly believe that this is what makes love so great.
Minus the crazy.